Bambi von Smash'er

Big derby day today…roster planning and meeting prep 11-12, Executive meeting 12-3pm, scrimmage 3-6pm, car park pow-ow 6-6.30pm. Sometimes I gasp at the hours that I (and others) pour into the sport of derby and the admin around it.
As I pulled up at home I was thinking how my man (an exceptional creature) beat me home via the Sunday bus timetable…somehow…anyway my neighbours were blasting a tune: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ouQ3HeluFV4 
Looking out on the morning rain
I used to feel uninspired
Oh Arethea…
It got me thinking about so many things…that song, in 3 minutes can evoke so much, a heart swell of emotion, thoughts of love, life…it amazes me what we can do, remember, feel, in only the tiniest pocket of time.

I guess what I think is that hours of our lives go by that we experience fully, all senses are ON…but at the end of our lives…what will we remember? I think it will be moments. A moment of Arethea at sunset in Autumn after training - the sky was turning, the breeze was cool but not too cool. Playing a game that is broken down into moments is interesting, it is like the universe is saying PAY ATTENTION you have 2 minutes to sort it out - you may not make it on the track again, this is it, DO IT…sometimes though do you think skaters feel they will get more chances? More time? The concept, or rather knowledge, that even with the same packs, jammers and all that you’ll never repeat a jam, never replicate it! Ah the jam, there are moments that utterly  fascinate me - a jam where you feel like you are hit more often than you draw breath, the synergy of being in a perfect pack - where you can sense your teammates over hearing or seeing them, having your benchie know your words before they have formed in the 30 seconds before the next jam. 

While I lingered in the driveway tonight with Arethea, my moment of today came in the seconds after in which I looked through the front door to see the kindest blue eyes I’ve ever known at the end of the hall…folding my washing.
While some might say that: 
Behind every great man there’s a great woman
I would say that:  
Behind every skater there’s a partner/friend/relative with patience and love for said skater enough to sink a Japanese whaling ship or other such similarly sized vessel.

personal training
team training 1
league training
personal training
league training
team training 2
personal training

REPEAT to infinity 

 BOUT

34 this week…is this where I thought I would be?…hrm…. 

I love this!!

barrelfish:

feministfitness:

after seeing how many fitness tumblrs engage in body shaming and telling women how they “should” look, i’ve decided to create a body-positive, feminist fitness tumblr.

i don’t think i can run it on my own, so i’m looking for co-authors, contributors, members, etc. to help me run it!

please signal boost this so that we can create the best feminist fitness tumblr possible!

http://feministfitness.tumblr.com

This sounds awesome!

Maybe I’ll put some posts on this. I think I can contribute. It’s taken me a long time to get comfortable with my shape. I’m short, which is forever pointed out to me by folks I do and don’t know, I’m also well endowed around the butt area….people don’t point that out so much though… Anyway, it actually wasn’t really until I started skating derby that I realized what an asset my body was - I don’t really mean ‘my’ body, but the body in general. I mean here I was, just over 30, and I was taking up roller derby. While I’ve had gruelling sessions and felt myself pushed, my body has never let me down. I’ve said ‘jump’ ad my body has answered with ‘how high?’ I simply couldn’t continue to self-loathe this part of me that really performed in every way I demanded, and not in just an average way, but in an awesome way. I have recently thought about a shake diet…resetting my hunger and all that, just slimming down a little, but then last week I engaged a personal trainer. This was for the purpose of getting a little more out of me body in terms of derby, in our discussion on goal setting I heard myself say ‘I’m not here to loose weight, I just need to up my fitness and strength for my sport’. If I had told myself 5 years ago that this would what im saying to a PT I would never have believed it. With a million photos out there of my ass, my thighs (oh dear lord) in hot pants I do cringe at times…but before where I saw bulk I now see power, strength and most of all empowerment. Life’s too short to continually beat ourselves up about our bodies ladies. Ask yourself, ‘can I physically do all of the things I want to do?’ if the answer is ‘yes’ then that is a gift right there so take it and hold it tight because life can change and even disappear in the blink of an eye. I actually regret the young hours of my life that have been used up on feeling shit about my body. My partne will tell you I look in the mirror sometimes and say ‘jeez look at my thighs, I wouldn’t mind them being a little leaner!!’ BUT then I put on my tight jeans, fitted t-shirt and go out into the world.

FYI I still have a cheek lump…and sometimes, it still hurts.
By Bambi von Smash’er and The Crazy Swede

Team England, they were good and the score would say better, and I admit it that on the day they were BUT (yes, there is always a nice big butt where I’m concerned) I don’t think it was a score realized on skills.  Jamming through the English pack was like trying to watch commercial tv for a 24 hour period and avoiding episodes of 3 and a 1/2 men…impossible. No matter how hard you try Charlie Sheen (the dik) always raises his ugly head. They had skills it’s true, and they certainly fought hard, but it was their team work that did it and they were ON. It was obvious they had been training together and they worked well together. While we Aussies knew what we were doing I do think this was the moment where our lack of preparation showed…but wait, don’t get me wrong, the way the year panned out for all of us I don’t think it could have been any other way, but this was the moment, while we fought hard and to to the bitter end it was the succinct efforts of that English pack that continually got the better of us. 
WHAT I LOVED was the continual effort and positivity from Team Aus, every skater worked so hard to the end. On a personal level the relentless pack has taught my inner jammer a thing or too and I am excited about how I think I’ll grow from this experience. With a loss to England we finished 4th, WOW. To think we were all just gunning to beat one team….and here were are, one place off a medal! 
Shorts came away with a well earned MVP for Team Aus, as always she was speechless and ran a mile before speaking to the media…who would think that one of Australia’s best jammers could be so camera shy, but that is part of what makes Shorts Shorts. 
There is so much to be proud of from the Tournie, I can’t wait to see what happens from here…Australia are a nice shining dot on the world map of derby…actually we perhaps always were but at least now, the world really knows it.

The last week has been a whirlwind…or maybe whirlpool?…but either way I’m contently exhausted, I think everything turned out as it should. I’m currently at LAX, it’s cold but luckily inspiring some written words as I have jipped any readers out there and left so much of this trip dangling. So, here goes, the first of a few posts in quick succession…
TEAM USA The final day of the cup was epic, we lost both our games but it was finally on this day that I woke up feeling like it was really truly bout day. With a game against the Team America the team knew what kind of outcome was potentially on the way but none the less the Aussie battling spirit was there. With 3 days of games already under our belts the team was starting to tire and so with a view to resting some already heavily utilized skaters, notably absent for example were jammers Cookie Cutter and Rose Ruin. Regardless Team Aus rolled out and gave the Amicanas some hell from down under. AmyKazeee (who took out the USA jammer very nicely during a jam in the first half) Cam and Tricksy were among the squad working their butts off and while Shorts was sent out to jam (which she did awesomely) and went hard like she always does she wasn’t worked as hard as we all know she can due to what we all knew was coming…the third place play off.
While my world cup experience exceeded all my deals and expectations I would have loved to be among the 14 skaters to line up against Team USA. Call me nuts but playing skaters whose skills are light years above and beyond my own…quite honestly…thrills me. To have Susy Hotrod or Joy Collision breathing down the back of my neck would be a derby dream come true.
Watching on as USA smashed in another victory of hundreds of points and this time over my teamies was hard but the green and gold fought hard and strong, inspiring.